My Hope is Built on Nothing Less than . . . Jesus return, the resurrection and judgement during the lives of NT readers.
Students of scripture are often reminded that just as successful real estate dealings depend on location, location, location, a successful heremeneutic depends on context, context, context. Here is just one of many descriptions of what this means (emphesis mine – DS):

Historical-critical study involves the attempt to discern the date, authorship, and recipients of the biblical materials, which involves the examination of materials internal to the manuscripts as well as external, archaeological and historical study. Modern interpretation must begin from a baseline that understands the most likely literal meaning of the text for those persons to whom it was first written. It is necessary to establish whether the text is prose, poetry, allegory, parable, or some other form of writing, for considerations bear directly on methods of interpreataion. For example,m few scholars would interpret Mark 9:47 literally: "if your eye causes you to sin, plick it out." Nor do many modern ministers follow Jesus’ instruction to "take nothing for the journey except a staff—no bread, no bag, no money in your belts. Wear sandals but not an extra tunic." (Mark 6:8,9). [David C Stancil]

Another important rule of proper exegesis is: a text can NEVER mean to later readers what it DIDN’T mean to the original recipients.

Students and theologians deal with this constantly as they exegete 1st century passages for application to 21st century discipleship. While each of the biblical writings have specific contexts, there is one common context that should be considered as we read, consider, and apply each NT document—the expectation of Jesus’ imminent return (parousia), the resurrection, and judgment (PRJ).

Here are just a few of the 100+ references to the imminent PRJ showing that every NT writer had this in mind when he wrote.

John the Baptist to Jews:
Matthew 3:2, "...Repent you: for the kingdom of heaven has drawn near."

Luke 3:7,9, "Then said he to the multitude... O generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath about to come? And now also the axe is laid…every tree therefore which bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire."

The Teachings of Jesus
Jesus to His twelve apostles (telling them to preach to Israel):

Matthew 10:7, "...preach, saying, The kingdom of heaven has drawn near. "

Matthew 10:23, "...In no wise will you have completed the cities of Israel, until the Son of man be come."

Notice Jesus told these 12 apostles that they would not have completed preaching to first-century Israel when the Son of man comes, which was during the destruction of Jerusalem in 70 AD.

Jesus to Peter, James, John and Andrew…privately:

Matthew 24:30,34, " they shall see the Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory…This generation shall not pass, till all these things be fulfilled."

Mark 13:24,25,30, " But in those days, after that tribulation, the sun shall be darkened, and the moon shall not give her light, And the stars of heaven shall fall, and the powers that are in heaven shall be shaken...this generation shall not pass, till all these things be done. "

Luke 21:22,26,32, "For these be the days of vengeance, that all things which are written may be fulfilled... for the powers of heaven shall be shaken…This generation shall not pass away, till all be fulfilled. "

"This generation" refers to the generation then living at the time Jesus spoke these words.

Jesus to His disciples:

Mark 8:38, "Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels."

What "generation" was Jesus referring to in this passage? Jesus said it was the adulterous and sinful generation that was then living while Jesus was alive! The above passage was spoken before this next passage (the following are all parallel verses):

Jesus to His twelve disciples (who were standing in front of Jesus):

Matthew 16:27-28, "For the Son of man is about to come in the glory of his Father with his angels; and then he shall reward every man according to his works. Verily I say unto you, There are some of those standing here, who in no wise shall taste of death, until they have seen the Son of man coming in his kingdom."

Mark 8:38 - 9:1, "…when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels....there are some of those standing here, who in no wise shall taste of death, until they see the kingdom of God having come in power. "

Luke 9:26-27, "... when he shall come in his own glory, and in his Father's, and of the holy angels…there are some of those standing here, who in no wise shall taste of death, until they have seen the kingdom of God. "

Notice how Jesus said that some of his disciples, who were standing right there in front of him, would not physically die by the time He came with his angels to reward every man according to his works (Revelation 22:12). John was one of these men who lived to see it...as you can see by the following verse...

Jesus to Peter:

John 21:22-23, "...If I desire him John) to abide till I come, what is that to thee?" [John was one of the twelve apostles who was never martyred, and abided on earth well after 70AD. Therefore, John did abide until Christ came in 70AD, just like Jesus desired him to!]

John 14:3, "And if I go and prepare a place for you, I am coming, and will receive you unto myself;"

Jesus to the high priest:

Matthew 26:64, "...Hereafter shall you see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven. "

Jesus to Nathanael:

John 1:51, "...you shall see heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending upon the Son of man. "

Jesus to Jews:

Matthew 4:17, "[you]...Repent: for the kingdom of heaven has drawn near. "

Matthew 23:36,38, "Verily I say unto you, All these things shall come upon this generation. Behold, your house is left unto you desolate."

Mark 1:15, "...The time has been fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has drawn near: "

Jesus to the daughters of Jerusalem:

Luke 23:28-29, "…weep not for me, but weep for yourselves, and for your children. For, behold, the days are coming,"

Jesus to the Jews who sought to kill him:

Matthew 3:7, "...O generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath about to come? "

John 5:25, "The hour is coming, and now is, when the dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God: and they that hear shall live."

The Revelation of Jesus Christ, communicated through John, to the seven literal churches which were in Asia in the first century:

Revelation 1:1, "The Revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave unto him, to shew unto his servants things which must take place shortly."

Revelation 1:3, "...the time is near."

Revelation 1:7, "Behold, he cometh with clouds; and every eye shall see him, and they also which pierced him." (Those Jews who had crucified Jesus in the first century would see his coming!)

Revelation 2:16, "...I am coming to thee quickly, "

Revelation 2:25, "…hold fast till I shall come." (To the church in Thyatira, 1 of 7 real churches that existed in Asia Minor between 61 and 65A.D.)

Revelation 3:11, "Behold, I come quickly:"

Revelation 10:6, "And sware by him that liveth for ever and ever…that there should be no more delay:" (Jesus said he would not delay his coming to those living in the first century!)

(The remaining verses are from the very last chapter of Revelation, after all these prophesies have been revealed. Just when will all these things come to pass? This chapter tells us!)

Revelation 22:6, "…God of the holy prophets sent his angel to shew unto his servants the things which must come to pass soon."

Revelation 22:7, "Behold, I am coming quickly:"

Revelation 22:10, "...Seal not the sayings of the prophecy of this book: for the time is near. "

Revelation 22:12, "And, behold, I come quickly;"

Revelation 22:20, "...Surely I am coming quickly. Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus."

The Teachings of the Apostles
Paul to all who were beloved of God in Rome:

Romans 13:11-12, " And that, knowing the time,...now is our salvation nearer than when we believed…the day has drawn near: "

Romans 16:20, "And the God of peace shall bruise Satan under your feet shortly." (See this prophesy in Genesis 3:15).

Paul to Timothy:

1 Timothy 6:14, "That you keep this commandment without spot, unrebukeable, until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ:"

2 Timothy 1:18, "The Lord grant unto him that he may find mercy of the Lord in that day:"

Paul (?) to the Hebrews:

Hebrews 1:1-2, "God…Hath in these last days spoken unto us by his Son," (The scripture says the last days were in the first century, not 2,000 years later).

Hebrews 9:26, "For then must he often have suffered since the foundation of the world: but now once in the consumation of the ages hath he appeared to put away sin by the sacrifice of himself."

Hebrews 10:25, "...you see the day drawing near. "

Hebrews 10:37, "...he that shall come will come, and will not delay." [Paul said that Jesus would not delay his coming!]

Paul to the Philippian church:

Philippians 4:5, "...The Lord is near. "

Paul to the church of Corinth:

1 Corinthians 1:7-8, "So that you come behind in no gift; waiting for the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ: Who shall also confirm you unto the end, that you may be blameless in the day of our Lord Jesus Christ."

1 Corinthians 7:29, "...the time is short: "

1 Corinthians 7:31, "...the fashion of this world passeth away."

1 Corinthians 10:11, "Now all these things happened unto them for ensamples: and they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the ages are arrived."

Paul, Silvanus and Timothy to the church of the Thessalonians:

1 Thessalonians 3:13, "To the end he may stablish your hearts unblameable in holiness before God, even our Father, at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ with all his saints."

1 Thessalonians 4:17, "Then we the living who remain shall be caught away together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord."

1 Thessalonians 5:23, "...and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. "

2 Thessalonians 2:2:, "...the day of Christ is present. "

Paul to the Galatians:

Galatians 4:4, "But when the fulness of the time was come, God sent forth his Son, made of a woman, made under the law,"

Galatians 5:5, "For we through the Spirit wait for the hope of righteousness by faith."

Paul to the Colossians:

Colossians 3:4, "When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in Glory."

James to the twelve tribes who were dispersed abroad:

James 5:7-9, "Be patient therefore, brethren, unto the coming of the Lord. …the coming of the Lord has drawn near…behold, the judge stands before the door."

Peter to the elect scattered abroad:

1 Peter 1:7, "That the proving of your faith…might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:"

1 Peter 1:9-10, "Receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls. Of which salvation the prophets have enquired and searched diligently, who prophesied of the grace that should come unto you:"

1 Peter 1:13,20, " Wherefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and hope to the end for the grace that is to be brought unto you at the appearing of Jesus Christ; Who verily was foreordained before the foundation of the world, but was manifest in these last times for you," (Now Peter confirms that the last days were during the first century).

1 Peter 4:5, "Who shall give account to him that is ready to judge the quick and the dead."

1 Peter 4:7, "But the end of all things has drawn near:"

1 Peter 4:17, "For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God:"

2 Peter 3:9, "The Lord does not delay concerning his promise" (What promise is this verse talking about? The very next verse reads, "But the day of the Lord will come..." Peter wrote the Lord would not delay his promise concerning the Day of the Lord!]

2 Peter 3:12, "Expecting and hastening the coming of the day of God,"

Peter to the Jewish men of the Empire visiting Judaea:

Acts 2:16-20, "But this is that which was spoken by the prophet Joel; And it shall come to pass in the last days…The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before that great and notable day of the Lord come:" (This confirms that the "last days" the Old Testament prophesized about took place in the first century).

Acts 3:24, "Ye, and all the prophets…have likewise foretold of these days." (Peter said ALL the prophets foretold of which days? "These days" of the first century, which were "the last days" of the Old Testament era).

John to those who believed in the name of the Son of God:

1 John 2:17-18, "And the world passeth away…Little children, it is the last hour…we know that it is the last hour." (John wrote these epistles sometime after 60 AD. Notice how, as 70.AD was very nearly approaching, John wrote that it is the "last hour", instead of the "last days.")

1 John 2:28, "And now, little children, abide in him; that, when he shall appear, we may have confidence, and not be ashamed before him at his coming."

1 John 3:2, "...when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is."

Readers/teachers since the second century have had great difficulty in understanding then explaining these references. I’m no different. There are several of them that are beyond my understanding. Faulty exegesis abounds in sermons, commentary, essays, blog entries, etc. Vigorous linguistic gymnastics have been necessary to show that the PRJ did not nor could not have happened as the NT writers expected.

One would expect an enemy of God/scripture/church, such as Bertrand Russell, in his book, Why I Am Not A Christian, to state:

"I am concerned with Christ as he appears in the gospel narrative…. He certainly thought that his second coming would occur in clouds of glory before the death of all the people who were living at the time. There are a great many texts that prove that. That was the belief of his earlier followers, and it was the basis of a good deal of his moral teaching."

But who would expect one of the most beloved Christian writers of the 20th century to say:

"Say what you like, we shall be told, "the apocalyptic beliefs of the first Christians have been proved false." It is clear from the NT that they all expected the Second Coming in their own lifetime. And, worse still, they had a reason, and one which you will find very embarrassing. Their Master had told them so! He shared, and indeed created, their delusion. He said these words, "this generation shall not pass till all these things be done." And He was wrong! He clearly knew no more about the end of the world than anyone else." (emphesis mine – DS)

Those words were written by CS Lewis in his essay, The Lord’s Last Night (1960) found in The Essential C.S. Lewis, pg 385.

I gotta tell you, if I believed what Lewis wrote, I would be out of here—faith in God/Jesus/scripture—in a flash. Here’s my bottom line: if Jesus DID NOT return, if the resurrection and judgment DID NOT happen as promised, I have NO CONFIDENCE in anything written in the entire Bible. What good is a resurrected liar?

Whatever one’s eschatological position (pre-, post-, a-, or preterist) depends on how one views two aspects of eschatological language: the when and the what. One must be viewed literally and the other figuratively. The futurist sees the what as being literal while the when must, therefore, be figurative. The preterist sees the when literally and the what figuratively.

Please take notice of the pronouns in the above passages. The antecedent of any "you", either sing or plural, is always the hearer/reader; not subsequent hearers/readers (including anyone in the 21st century -- that's us, folks).

One may insist upon the figurtive understanding of the when while completely misunderstanding the who. When we perform all those linguistic gyrations needed to make the when mean something other than the original reader would have understood in order to literalize the what, one is still left with the need to figurtize the who. How would the writer/recipient (the we, us, you) set aside the when to some far distant what?

I, for one, cannot do that. I see it as two – when (soon, at hand) and who (original readers and "this generation") -- against one – what (PRJ). I’ll go with the two.

5

From the Pew: For God So Hated The World

From the Pew: For God So Hated The World

I'm a GREAT grandaddy

Our oldest daughter called us this morning (it was really dark!) to tell us that Addison Kate Cline arrived at 0258 weighing in at 6'13 and 19.5". Jenny's labor wasn't too long and the delivery went well.

I just wish she was closer than the 3000 miles that separate us. Oh, well.

More later.

Good reads

Here are books I’ve read recently or are on my “to read” shelf. I got most (used) from Amazon.
*** are absolute must reads. ** must reads.

*** The Body Broken: Embracing the Peace of Christ in a Fragmented Church
Jack Reese does a wonderful job at identifying the causes of church splits without dealing with the issues themselves. Includes about as good a explanation of Phillipians as I’ve read.

*** How to Forgive When You Don't Know How by Bishop, Jacqui; Grunte, Mary
This is about as good as it gets on the subject.

*** Jesus Through Middle Eastern Eyes: Cultural Studies in the Gospels
Some of the best discussions of parables, SoM, women.

*** Decision Making and the Will of God: A Biblical Alternative to the Traditional View
Friesen will relieve much anxiety in every day decision making.

*** Facing Our Failure: The Fellowship Dilemma in the Conservative Churches of Christ by Todd Deaver – here is a book that discloses many inconsistencies on the part of all RM congregations in extending fellowship.

*** The New Testament World: Insights from Cultural Anthropology by Bruce J Malina

*** American Jesus: How the Son of God Became a National Icon
and
*** Brand Jesus: Christianity in a Consumerist Age
Taken together, these two illuminate a huge obstacle to be overcome in our evangelism.

*** A Tale of three Kings: A Study in Brokenness [Paperback] by Edwards, Gene
Absolute MUST read, especially for elders and wantabe elders

*** Constantine's Bible: Politics and the Making of the New Testament
As good as there is on the canonization of scripture

** Hebrews: A Call to Commitment by Lane, William L.
This is my favorite. A small paperback.

** The Doctrine of the Trinity: Christianity's Self-Inflicted Wound
The best I’ve read on this subject

** Roman Wives, Roman Widows: The Appearance of New Women and the Pauline Communities
Neither egalitarian nor complementarian. Does explain much of Paul’s statements concerning women.

** The Myth of Certainty: The Reflective Christian & the Risk of Commitment
A reminder/warning for all of us.

The Lost History of Christianity: The Thousand-Year Golden Age of the Church in the Middle East, Africa, and Asia--and How It Died
A must read for church history buffs

Spiritual Marketplace: Baby Boomers and the Remaking of American Religion

Truth Is Stranger Than It Used to Be: Biblical Faith in a Postmodern Age

Images Of The Church In The New Testament (New Testament Library)

Colossians Remixed: Subverting the Empire

Love Your God With All Your Mind: The Role of Reason in the Life of the Soul

unChristian: What a New Generation Really Thinks about Christianity... and Why It Matters
This is a real eye-opener.

From Symposium to Eucharist: The Banquet in the Early Christian World...
Shows how the Christian assembly mirrored the common meal of the 1st century

Jesus of Nazareth by Pope Benedict 16. An amazing read. No RC propaganda.

Redeemer Nation: The Idea of America's Millennial Role
Documents America’s attempt at policing the world

Stealing Jesus: How Fundamentalism Betrays Christianity

In the Shadow of the Temple: Jewish Influences on Early Christianity

Idols for Destruction: The Conflict of Christian Faith and American Culture
Herbert Schlossberg


The Language of God: A Scientist Presents Evidence for Belief
Francis Collins

Render to Caesar: Jesus, the Early Church and the Roman Superpower
Christopher Bryan

Gene Edwards’ depiction of Acts: Peter & Paul’s ministry
These six books should be required reading for every student of the NT church. They are written as adventure novels that fill in the blanks of Acts. Jr High kids enjoy them a great deal. I got a complete set for $50 – well spent.
Revolution - The story of the first seventeen years of the Christian faith. This book begins where The Triumph leaves off . . . at Pentecost. You should know that this is not a book for the faint-hearted. Edwards wrote Revolution at age thirty. It is a book which keeps asking the question: “Does the first 17 years of Christian history look anything like the modern-day practice of Christianity?” If you want your Christian practices challenged, this is the book to read. If you are a Christian desperately struggling with the problem of “church,” you will want to read this book.
The Silas Diary - This book takes up exactly where Revolution ends. It opens with Paul and Barnabas leaving Antioch, until the time they returned four years later. During those four years Paul planted four churches in the Gentile world. When you have finished The Silas Diary you will understand the book of Galatians. In fact, Galatians will come alive to you in Technicolor, 3-D, and stereophonic surround-sound. And if your experience is like others who have read this book you will find yourself saying, “I feel like I was there. I met Paul. I feel like I have met Barnabas. And now I know what it was like to live in the first century. I know the Galatian Christians. I feel like I have been in their homes and gathered with them in their meetings. As to Paul and Barnabas, when they hurt, I hurt; when they were cold, I was cold; when they cried, I cried; when they triumphed over their enemies—the Judaizers, who were trying to destroy those four churches—I stood up and cheered.”
The Titus Diary - This book takes up where The Silas Diary leaves off, Paul is on his second journey, a journey into Greece. (In those days northern Greece was called Macedonia and southern Greece was called Achaia.) This is the story of Paul in Philippi, Thessalonica, Berea and Corinth. When you have finished this book you will feel as though the lashes received at Philippi landed on your back, that you were in that prison cell when the earthquake came. You will feel you actually visited Corinth and smelled its streets, heard the hawkers in the marketplace, and watched the slaves as they pulled ships across dry land. You will understand their problems as three cultures clashed there in that Corinthian church. You will meet the wonderful Priscilla. Later you will sit in the room with Paul as he writes I Thessalonians. You will be able to pick up I Corinthians and understand every word of it, with perfect clarity.
The Timothy Diary - The Timothy Diary tells you the story of Paul's journey, his time in Ephesus and how he trained eight young men to be church planters. In The Timothy Diary Paul's young Christian companion, Timothy, gives a firsthand account of the third journey, how Paul trains a handful of young men to take his place after his death. Stand beside Timothy as he meets the apostle Peter- "The Rock"! Feel Timothy's surprise and nervousness as Paul asks him to preach in Solomon's Colonnade before the entire Jerusalem assembly, including several of the Twelve! Hear Paul's answers to the very difficult questions posed by the church in Corinth.
The Priscilla Diary - Hear the stories of Paul's continued travels to the first-century churches narrated from the unique perspective of Priscilla, a vibrant first-century Christian woman! Paul faces "the darkest days of his entire life" while he frantically searches for the missing Titus. Are Paul's fears warranted? Has Titus been assassinated in Corinth? Read of the writing of Paul's most personally revealing letter to the church at Corinth. And marvel at the truths Paul conveys to the church in Rome, a letter "of all that Paul considered central to the Christian life." In Jerusalem Paul faces his old enemies and stands trial before the Roman and Jewish officials. Paul spends years in jail before the Roman governor issues a ruling that sends Paul to Rome in chains. Paul's final and most harrowing journey by ship awaits him!
The Gaius Diary - Gaius tells of the fall of Jerusalem and the martyrdom of Christians torn apart by wild animals in the Coliseum and of others perishing as human torches in Nero's garden. Near the end of the book Paul's own death is very movingly described. Despite seemingly overwhelming persecution, the church survives and successfully incorporated Gentile and Jewish Christians with the incredible shepherding of two apostles: Paul (founder of many Gentile churches) and Peter (Jesus' disciple and head of the Jerusalem church).

Are we teaching another gospel?

No greater love than the man who recognizes the shortcomings of his spiritual legacy and braves the slings and arrows of proponents of those shortcomings when he voices his observations. Here is one such critique by a life-long Restorationist and elder of Alabama congregation.

This brother along with Al Maxey are voices of reason within our branch of the tree of Christianity.

Dan

iMonk on salvation and the church

Michael Spencer, the internetMonk, takes well deserved pot-shots at the Church of Christ. Check it out. Don't miss the many comments.

FWIW, I do believe that salvation is directly tied to church participation, i.e., a Christian disconnected from a local representation of the Body of Christ (with whatever Sign Out Front) is doomed to death just as my finger would be when separated from my body.

Guilty parenting

Many times during the past 55 or so years I've noted the lives of children of spiritual parents and wondered what was wrong within the home that produced such terrible kids (me included). Then I became a father -- 4 times in 42 months -- and prayed constantly that my kids wouldn't be like those preacher/elder/saintly fathers. Despite my failures (but their mother's successes), my daughters love the Lord and do their best to provide their children healthy Godly homes. They did a great job.

I've reached the conclusion that John Rosemond (see below) is right -- while homelife is a strong influence, a kid does what that kid will do.

Here's Rosemond's column from last week (bold emphases mine):

Living with Children
John Rosemond
Copyright 2009, John K. Rosemond

One of the defining features of today’s parenting mindset is guilt. Mothers seem to be especially susceptible to this psychological virus—today’s moms, that is. Fifty years and more ago, before the psychological parenting revolution of the late 1960s and early 1970s, mothers were more immune to guilt. Back then, when a child behaved badly, the mother made the child feel guilty. These days, when a child behaves badly, the child’s mother is likely to experience the guilt due the offense.

This has happened because today’s moms—the primary consumers of parenting information and therefore its primary victims—believe that parenting produces the child. That’s understandable. After all, if one goes to a mental health professional because of some problem, the overwhelming likelihood is that the MHP is going to ask questions about the person’s childhood. Determinism has been a dominant feature of much if not most psychological theory since Freud, and even though it is not supported by research or common sense, it lingers on.

Mainstream psychological theory is hard pressed to explain how a person who grows up with every conceivable advantage takes a hard left turn as a young adult and winds up trashing his life, much less that he keeps making the same mistakes over and over and over again. Violent criminals do not all come from violent families. Pathological liars do not all come from pathological families.

The only conclusion upheld by common sense: Parenting does not produce the child. Parenting is an influence, and it is certainly prudent for parents to do what they can to maximize positive influence, but in the final analysis, the child produces himself. At any given point in his life, he takes your influence (along with a host of others) and he decides what to do with it. He is the decider.

Prior to the Age of Psychological Parenting, parents understood that they could only do so much. They understood that no matter how “good” their parenting was, their children were still capable on any given day of going to school or out into the community and doing bad things—really bad, even. In the final analysis, therefore, their children were responsible for their own behavior. So back in those not-so-long-ago days, when a child misbehaved, the child’s parents weren’t likely to agonize over it, punishing themselves. They punished him.

All too many of today’s parents, in the same circumstances, punish themselves. They agonize. They feel bad. They search themselves for the answer to “Why?” Consequently, their children are not being held fully responsible.

Of late, I’ve been asking my audiences two questions:Is parenting more or less stressful, do you think, than it was in the 1950s? Are today’s children more or less happy than were children in the 1950s?Every audience—of which there have been approximately ten so far—has reached instant consensus. Their answers have been, respectively, more and less. Those are, of course, the correct answers. I simply propose that much of the stress is due to parents holding themselves responsible for their children’s misbehavior. And I propose that much of the unhappiness is because children are not being held responsible for their own behavior.

Family psychologist John Rosemond answers parents' questions on his website at www.rosemond.com .